Innercitywoman's Blog

ABOUT/CONTACT

Hi, I’m Ingrid – the tad delusional, Englands’ answer to Oprah – just nuttier!

I’m a Life Coach,  Columnist and Radio Presenter who specialises in issues relating to The Inner City Woman.

 I produce and present the Community Show for Westside Radio 89.6FM, every Monday and Wednesday between 2-4 pm,covering local issues on Health, Policing, Politics, Entertainment, Arts and culture.

I’m also the co-presenter, and Entertainment Guru providing weekly film reviews every Sunday at 5pm, on the Sound of the Suburbs show for Sydenham Radio.co.uk 106.8 FM.

What’s more, as the Family Columnist for the South London Press, you’ll find my Getting Your Groove Back Column, focusing on issues surrounding Parenting. You can also check out my somewhat controversial article here in the Guardian, regarding schooling.

Please call 07788 736604 or email ingridmarsh@btinternet.com to contact me.

My aim in life is to help women and mums through the humps and bumps of everyday life.

To put that Spring in their step, that Magic back in their mojo,

and have them looking and feeling absolutely Great again!

About me:

 In my younger days when I was an Air Stewardess, I was horrified when we were taught that in the case of a plane ditching, the parents were to don their own life jackets before putting them on their children. I said to the  trainer; ‘Surely we should save the child first?’

Her response was this:

‘You have to save yourself first in order to save the child.

So let’s kick start with the way it was….

 I am a mother of a wonderful boy called Max, who is 8 at the time of writing. Against all odds, I had a successful business which fulfilled my goal of being self sufficient. Owned my own home which gave me the financial security I desired. Was able to comfortably pay for the style of schooling I valued for my son and able to travel extensively.

I achieved all this because I bought my first home at the age 23, took many risks, some good, some not so good and had worked my butt off since the age of 16.

I currently live with my son and a very fat Cat.

My kids Dad

Relationship wise, I split from my child’s father when my baby was just six months old.  However, I read some research that said the next best thing for kids who are not living with happy parents, is for them to have happy separated ones.  So, although at times it is a strenuous friendship with many a bitter story to tell, for the sake of our son and a balance child, I’ve  forgiven a lot and reevaluated my pain so we can still laugh and have fun together.

The Boyfriend

Boyfriend post baby developed the mental illness, bipolar disorder when his ex partner ran off with his kids without trace. In my quest to make him better, I lost myself in the process.  Juggling my Son, my business and his recovery depleted me of every living cell I had in my body. I hired a private detective, sought solicitors and so forth and managed to track down the Mother of his children to reunite him with his kids. It was a very difficult time.  Although, in truth, what freaked me out the most; more than anything, was witnessing how a tall, strapping handsome man could be reduced to what he had become through this illness.  I will never forget it. Second to splitting up with the father of my child, it was the worst time of my life.

During the turmoil, my business suffered immensely and subsequently went down the drain.  I struggled through huge financial difficulties and nearly lost it all. After his recovery, he no longer wanted me and went back to the previous partner who had ran off with his kids.  It’s sounds like a bloomin soap opera, right?

At the end of it all, whilst trying to be a great Mum, a supportive and caring partner and a business woman, I lost track of who I was and what I stood for and subsequently my self esteem went down the loo.  I was always known as a bubbly, happy, fearless, fun, brave, go getting individual and often described as a happy go lucky ‘posh hippy’. So when this turmoil came to an end, most tragic of all, was that I lost my Groove.

Depression

I went through a pretty crap time myself after that.  The light had completely gone and I couldn’t understand what this life thing was all about. I felt so suicidal and would often think of different ways of achieving this.

I guess it was my son that kept me going through the darker times.  Just thinking of the sadness it would cause him if Mummy wasn’t around anymore, was too much to bear.  So that’s what kept me alive. My Son.

Despite having an incredibly supportive sister and friends around me, I knew at the end of the day that in order to get out of this crap feeling,  ultimately I had to save myself.

How I got my Groove Back.

I was at a crossroads in my career, so I looked into this life coaching thing I kept hearing about and did an introductory course.

The information felt like a small little tweeny light.  The more I studied it, the more light flooded in and the more a whole new world started to open back up again for me.

Women Like Me

Two disastrous relationships, one after the other, a change had to come. I became extremely passionate about making a change for other women, who whilst trying to be everything to  everybody,  have lost their their Groove in the process. Women often think that having a partner/husband will solve everything and often make relationships define who they are.

Getting Your Groove Backis about having a relationship with yourself first and foremost before you can have a successful relationship with anyone else.  

In truth I have become obsessive about making that change which meant studying in great detail about how our minds works. I read every book recommended to me. Attended every course, studied every bit of research available. I became obsessive in wanting to know why two people, faced with the exact same situation, had  completely different coping mechanisms. Why some relationships lasted all of two minutes while others lasted happily for years.  Why some women are attracted to wrong kind of man – continuously! And studied why some women simply had it sussed!  For women especially, I think life can be particularly tough as we are expected to be everything to everybody.  To be beautiful, to be great partners, to be great home makers, great parents and great lovers, all in the space of just a few hours a day. I have so many women friends who are stressed to the hills trying to achieve it all.

It’s all gone a bit potty

Studies show that there has never been so many women on Prozac like there is today.  That grieves me. Especially with my new found knowledge, that if we were to only change our thinking, half our problems would go away. We’d also have great Relationships and Great Sex and if we wasn’t in a relationship, to be gloriously happy in the meantime!

 Research also shows that women, despite all the mod cons available to them today, are more stressed now than they were in the 50’s when we had to survive on rations.  That’s nuts.

So in my usual, I can save the world attitude, I now dedicate my time and energy to women like me who need to recognise that until they put themselves first, have a relationship with themselves first, they are in fact at risk of loosing everything!

I am now on a complete career change too, and studying to become a radio presenter.  Through this medium I  present a modern day ‘Girly Hour” that deals with real women and real issues.  This career change, is the final part of me getting my groove back.  I risk loosing a lot in the process, but also gaining a whole lot more.

I have always loved laughing.  There is always a smile on my face.  What’s new however, is that I no longer take life so seriously.  Therefore my approach is fun and laid back, because hey, shit happens.

 Furthermore and most importantly;

Nothing,  has meaning, except for the meaning you give it.

Check back often for some hot tips on getting your groove back, so you too, can one day write your memoirs of how;

You Got Your Groove Back!

This site is dedicated to Women, Love, Sex and Successful relationships with themselves first and foremost.

Email me: innercitywoman@btinernet.com or call 07788 736604

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: